Thursday, May 27, 2010

Chai guy, not a shy guy

Am I the only one that develops embarrassing girl crushes on barista's? On the whole I don't expose myself to them all that often as I've a penchant for tea, not coffee, however I do find that tea drinkers are few and far between in the modern day office environment and thus, I seem to end up going out for an awful lot of working coffee meetings...
At my previous place of employment there was very little to look at around the office and even less outside of it apart from this one coffee shop in the building across the street which housed a rather fetching young man frothing the milk.
Having forced myself to develop a liking for a beverage that wasn't coffee but still required the skills of a professional, I developed a litre a day addiction to skinny chai lattes (for the record - there is actually nothing skinny about having 2 large cups a day, 5 days a week).
After 3 long months of ordering 2 chai lattes every single day and trying to squeeze in 30 seconds worth of witty banter between orders, chai guy finally asked me out.
Turns out there really wasn't much more to him than the wonderful things he could do with a pot of honey, a teaspoon of cinnamon and some chai powder. The deal breaker, (apart from the total lack of conversation and intelligence) was that he had more tattoos than you could poke a stick should always be suspicious of people that feel it necessary to tattoo the names of thier family members all over thier body. I mean, are they worried they will forget them? Especially when you have not one or two siblings, but SEVEN. In the presence of such an obscenely large family I would normally speculate that he was Catholic; but there was nothing religious about chai guy.

Definitely for the best, I was in danger of becoming lactose intolerant anyway.

But now I find myself again faking a coffee habit (you can't drink English Breakfast in an Italian cafe) and having to attend coffee meetings at my new boss's favourite coffee shop where I am quite literally driven to distraction by the owner. Picture a tall, dark and ridiculously handsome 30-something alpha male that swans around flexing his enormous biceps and being all Italian and broody. Not only am I unable to focus on anything work related in these meetings, but I literally blush and go weak at the knees when he walks past; and you can forget about actually being able to order anything. As soon as he opens his mouth and pours out a list of ingredients in Italian, I'm on the floor.

Quite pathetic really for a 27 yr old to be so completely useless. For the sake of my productivity though, I really do feel we may need to find a new coffee shop.

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