Relief comes in many forms it would seem. There is the kind of relief you get when you find out you made it home after a night out without losing your mobile again, the kind you get when you pull into the driveway having made it all the way home on empty, the kind you get when you make it to work without being busted by the ticket inspector and the kind you experience when you realize you don’t actually want to be with Dumper anymore, ever again.
After the initial 24 hours of contemplating how much weight I stood to lose on account of being ditched for the THIRD time by the same person, something amazing happened…
Having not eaten all day I accepted the kind invitation of a colleague to join her for dinner; I went to the trouble of showering, drying my eyes and fluffing my hair, jumped in the car, cranked up the Eurythmics 'Thorn in My Side' on the radio and drove to Richmond.
3 flights of stairs awaited me when I reached said colleagues apartment. I struggled up the stairs on the 5 cups of tea, one mouthful of curry and generous amount of Valium I had consumed in the last 24 hours and upon reaching her landing she leapt across the threshold and gave me a hug. Whilst basking in the warmth of her hug and thinking how lucky I am to have such great friends, I peered over her shoulder and nearly passed out. There, sitting calmly on her newly purchased IKEA upholstery, was a truly delicious creature that she then went on to introduce as her single, HOT cousin.
Suddenly my appetite is BACK.